Archive for August, 2010

Nina Loves Girls 2

Posted in Uncategorized on August 13th, 2010
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Nina Loves Girls 2

Nina loves a lot more than girls, I tell you that. Just so happens her that my girl Nica Noelle has got her lapping up the juices of some fine women in the second edition of Nina Loves Girls. That’s what happens when you get to be like a legend, you know. You get to be in all the scenes and do whatever and whoever you want.

The cool thing about this movie is that Nicole Ray, Dia Zerva, Justine Joli and Syd Blakovich all have very different fucking styles. But, you get even the most aggressive of the girls looking all full of awe in the shadow of porn royalty. It doesn’t take very long to see who is really in control in all these pussy-filled scenes.

I’d love to have a go with Nina that’s for sure. Only a monster fuck is missing from her fuck resume just like a legend is missing from mine. If you’re reading this, Nina…call me!

Nina Hartley

Posted in Featured Star on August 11th, 2010
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Nina Hartley

If you can do what you do so good enough that people call you a legend then that’s pretty cool. And if you get to be still around when the stories are told and you’re a living legend then that’s even better. But, there sure ain’t a lot of people that get to be a living legend and still do whatever it is they do that made them a legend in the first place.

That’s what my girl Nina Hartley is. Her fuck ability is a thing of legend and she still fucking all this time later being a crazy sexy MILF now. She even got into a couple porn Hall of Fames: the Exarco and the Ayveean. Uh, I guess you humans know them better as just letters – XRCO and the AVN.

Aside from her crazy fucking, she has been around long enough to teach people about the business too. She has a whole line of school-type videos to show people how to fuck better. I don’t know if those lessons do good for monsters or anything like that. I suppose probably not much because we just know how to fuck. I hope all my skillz turns me into a legend someday just like Nina!

Seasoned Players 1

Mom's Cuckol

Nina Hartley's Guide to Anal Sex

Featured Studio: Marc Dorcel

Posted in Featured Studio on August 10th, 2010
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Initiation of Lou Charmelle

Initiation of Lou Charmelle

I think Euros must think what most of us in the US call fetish is just everyday sex. Stuff like bondage, spanking, BDSM, and latex is pretty kinky to us but it seems like it would be pretty tame and regular to them.

But when you watch movies like Marc Dorcel‘s stuff, it’s far from tame. It’s fuckin’ with real passion and I like to watch it because of the accents too, I admit.Usually they’re talking another language anyway. French, German, Czech, Hungarian, Romanian, and Italian girls are super hot even if you don’t know what the hell they’re saying. Like Lou Charmelle, that girl with her pretty, natural titties out on that box cover on the left? I can think of a lot of ways I would love to bend her and nail her. All those people in the background can watch too, I don’t get shy with voyeurs hanging around. That girl on the left is pretty hot too, so maybe we could have a 3-way. The movie has a lot of those so I think she probably is into it! I can’t really see that blonde girl on the right but hell, let her join in and we could have an orgy!

Some other good Marc Dorcel movies are out there and I think you will like them if you’re in the mood for porn that is really stylish, like fashion model stylish, but with some of the hardest sex you ever saw. Even the lesbian porn is really hardcore and you will wish you could get a girl that nasty.

Pornochic 18: Aletta

Pornochic 18: Aletta

Clara's Secret

Clara's Secret

Lesbian Prison

Lesbian Prison

To Catch a Predator Parody

Posted in Feature on August 9th, 2010
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To Catch a Predator Parody

You humans got all these laws and stuff. One of the real big ones is the underage sex thing. That’s good ’cause fucking is for adults. It’s such a huge deal that this one TV show set up cameras and shit to catch creepy dudes who try to make their move with the young ones. It’s gotten real popular because there’s something real appealing about seeing some dirtbag’s face sink when he knows he’s been set up and walked into a trap.

Of course, with the Zero Tolerance release of this parody on the show, it kind of proves that there is a double standard going on big time. Here, you do a movie where the women MILFs are the stalkers going after young guys to try to fuck them and it’s no longer a felony; it’s a parody. The truth is, though, that any guy would want to be tracked down by a hot MILF with hot body, ass and big tits and fucked silly. And after they’re done, they would want to do it again. They don’t want any hot chick to go to jail over that! It’s a badge of honor.

What they should do is let these women like Julia Ann and India Summer and Dyanna Lauren corrupt and then let this monster corrupt them as punishment. Eye for an eye kind of thing. Well, I suppose more like reverse eye for an eye in some cases. So, like when Julia Ann sucks James Deen’s cock, I’d get to eat her pussy. Seems if you want justice then it’s the fair way to go.

MILF Hotties of Porn: Julia Ann

Posted in AVN Nominees, Featured Star on August 7th, 2010
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Julia Ann

Julia Ann

Julia Ann keeps on being hot as hell! Even in her 40s she can put some girls half her age to shame with that amazing lean but still curvy body and awesome boobs. She is the MILF that all other MILFs should aspire to be… an award winning MILF too, from AVN this year (MILF/Cougar Performer of the Year for 2010).

Even when she had to pretend to be an old lady in that Golden Girls parody from New Sensations, Julia Ann was still smokin’. Turns out she was only old for the first and last parts of that movie, since the actual fucking happened in flashback, but the point is she was sexy the whole time. Made me wanna hit up Florida in case there might be a cougar like her living down there… I could have had a nasty surprise if I hadn’t remembered it was only a movie. sometimes I got a few problems remembering movies and real life ain’t the same because I watch so much porn.

Anyway… before doing porn, Julia Ann was a pro mud wrestler in Hollywood. She joined up with Janine Lindemulder (aka Janine these days) to do a touring stripper act called Blondage in the early ’90s. They did a scene together in Andrew Blake’s porn classic “Hidden Obsessions” in 1993 and the rest was smut history. Now Julia is in the AVN Hall of Fame and she keeps doing great scenes.

Don’t let anybody tell you that only young sluts are sexy. If they try, just show them a picture of Julia Ann or one of her scenes. And then there’s this pic. I don’t know about you but I can’t stop staring at those hot titties, and having them there twice because of the mirror means I might be here all day…

POV Jugg Fuckers 2

POV Jugg Fuckers 2

To Catch a Predator Parody

To Catch a Predator Parody

The Brother Load 2

The Brother Load 2

The Golden Girls: A XXX MILF Parody

Posted in Feature, New Release on August 5th, 2010
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The Golden Girls: A XXX MILF Parody

The Golden Girls: A XXX MILF Parody

With Betty White being all the rage, it’s no surprise New Sensations made “The Golden Girls: A XXX MILF Parody.” One morning, Dorothy tells the girls her friend Jean is coming to visit and Rose gets uncomfortable remembering how Jean put the moves on her before. Then we flash back 20 years and that’s when all the fucking happens.

Diamond Foxxx plays Blanche as a proud slut. She calls plumber Johnny Castle to tempt Jean with some man meat but ends up getting him herself because Jean’s not interested. Those big tits are a great piece of bait that Johnny can’t help grabbing. Diamond is super hot with good deep throating skills. Great shots of her ass, too.

Dorothy (Raylene) hasn’t been fucked in years and thanks to a pep talk from Blanche, she puts moves on landscaper Rocco Reed. Raylene has the great tits and nice ass she always had, so even though she’s no young babe she’s definitely a MILF. Rocco spends a while getting her ready by eating her pussy and she sucks his cock. Things get hotter once she’s riding him.

Later, Rose (Julia Ann) tells Sophia she’s falling for Jean. Sophia says maybe it’s because she hasn’t had a man in a while, and as luck would have it a man shows up to deliver flowers to Rose from Jean. Joel (Levi Cash) is eager to stroke her petals and she opens up to him. They build up good heat and Julia Ann shows why she’s the AVN MILF Performer of the Year with the way she goes after the cock. She blows him for a long time before he gives her a nice licking. Rose is mature, but she’s flexible and I don’t just mean she’s got an open mind. She fingers her own butt while he’s doing her sidesaddle.

That night, Jean (Jewels Jade) goes to the kitchen and finds Marcus (James Deen), another plumber. After she shares her cheesecake and her troubles with him, he charms his way into her panties and makes her scream by eating and fingering her pussy. Jewels has huge fake tits and a tight body, and looks anything but old. Marcus fucks her so good that when Blanche shows up looking for her midnight snack of Marcus, Jean admits fucking a man was good. Rose shows up in the living room to see what all the noise is. Jean thanks Rose for helping her see that she’s bi after all. Now Jean wants to fuck her way to Fort Lauderdale, men and women alike.

Sophia (Rachel Love) comes out to complain about the noise and how it’s keeping her from doing laundry. It turns out it’s not laundry but Londra (gorgeous Puma Swede). There is a lot of breast play and it’s great because they both have such big tits, Puma’s silicone and Rachel’s all natural. They have some nice, wet pussy play and use some dildos. Twenty years later, Sophia is still smiling about it at the end of the movie.

These turn out to be Golden Cougars and not the elderly women from the original Golden Girls, but that’s good if you’re more into MILFs than GILFs. It’s a good way to pornify the show and make it sexy.

Julia Ann

Julia Ann

Diamond Foxx

Diamond Foxx

Raylene

Raylene

Mother-Daughter Exchange Club 9

Posted in Uncategorized on August 4th, 2010
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Mother Daughter Exchange Club 9

I remember when this bad wicked series first dropped. It was something really new and cool. And even now that they’ve done like ten of these now, the concept is still a real good one. To be honest, this is one of those type of series that could really go to infinity.

Done by my boys over at Girlfriends Films, MDEC uses this old idea of women lusting after girls but updates it by including the social networking craze that you humans like so much. Computers…sheesh. I’d rather network with some chick in person. Anyway, these women and their daughters start this club and then hook up with other mother-daughter pairs using these network sites and then they swap daughters for some good fuck sessions. The thing that makes this series so damn fucking good though is that the fucking is like totally real. I mean, it’s real in other movies too, but it doesn’t always feel real, you know? These scenes show that even MILFs with a ton of experience can get nervous still when hooking up with hot young babes and stuff. None of it feels staged or made up.

If you watch anything in this one, check out Kara Novak doing some muff munching and 69 with Lexi Lamour. And also check out the third scene with blonde babes Kagney Linn Karter and Violet Addamson grinding each other’s pussies together. Lexi also does a threeway with Montana Skye and Allie Haze. And in the last scene the hot MILF Julia Ann gets it on good with Victoria White.

And when you’re done getting amazed by this new movie, there are eight previous editions that you can watch too. Or better yet, you can just go start your own club. Just make sure to allow monsters!

5 Filthy Fetishes

Posted in New Release on August 3rd, 2010
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5 Filthy Fetishes

5 Filthy Fetishes

This ain’t fetish like with big scary hardcore kinky stuff. It’s more like an introduction to different kinky things that get people off and they ain’t all what you expect. Asa Akira introduces the scenes like a really hot sex teacher… while pushing a dude down in the water because he gets off on it.

Lindy Lane is first and even though she looks innocent and sweet lighting candles, it turns out she gets off on sex in life-threatening situations. So does her boyfriend Seth Gamble, who turns on the gas stove and comes in to tell her they have 12 minutes to fuck before KABOOM! She takes her sweet ass time stripping and fondling her natural tits but  things speed up a little when she has her top off. She deep throats him while he tastes her bald pussy. With about seven minutes left to go he slides his dick inside and pounds away. Their fuck is hot but you might be distracted worrying if they’re gonna make it out alive.

Sophia Lomeli gets off on fucking dangerous criminals and the chance of getting robbed, so she gets dolled up in a fur coat and walks through a bad neighborhood, where she leads three shady dudes down an alley, up a staircase, and through a warehouse. She stops, turns, opens the coat and we see her hot body naked under the coat! Johnny Castle says it’s his turn to go first. While she taunts him, he puts his rough hands all over those beautiful tits and makes out with her before they get to fucking. First they trade oral before she lays back and gets fucked mish style, her big tits bouncing. I had to jerk off before I could finish the scene cuz it was so hot, and writing about it is making me wanna fuck. I gotta hurry through the other scenes!

There’s a couple (Amia Miley and Rocco Reed) who get off on fucking after murdering his wife. There’s Chayse Evans and Yurizan Beltran, who get off on women’s breasts (mainly Yurizan’s bigguns) and Chayse being kind of like a dude, rough and wearing a strap-on. Finally we get to see Asa in action with Bill Bailey, the dude she’s been shoving in the water. He’s her submissive and she gets off on dominating him… well, that and fucking him.

So basically, this ain’t one of those fetish movies where there’s no sex, don’t worry. This is a good movie for anybody who likes a mix of kinky stuff with regular sex.

Asian Strap: She Fuck U Long Time

Posted in Uncategorized on August 2nd, 2010
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Asian Strap: She Fuck U Long Time

I hurt my hands the other day *OUCH*, so I need to give my fingers a bit of a rest. Here’s the box cover to tell you what’s going on!

Kinky Uncle Joey spins off his wildly successful Strap Attack series with this tasty genre-crossing collection of plastic-wielding American-Asian wild girls out to wreak carnage on the anuses of whatever unwary sissy-boys cross their paths! Asian Strap: She Fuck You Long Time kicks off with cheerful Italian-Japanese Coco Velvett walking Wolf Hudson down the street blindfolded and on a leash, letting him beg before she takes him back to Joey’s place and lets him eat her ass and bang her pussy before turning the tables. Then china-doll cutie Kita Zen teams up with big, loud and bouncy Jessica Bangkok to decimate Vin Deacon – after sucking his cock and taking it for a ride, of course. Wolf comes crawling back just in time to be sodomized by thick island princess Mia Leilani, who does a slick and sweaty poolside tease first, turning Wolf into her Man Friday before having her way with him. Newcomer Beti Hana is a tall Korean-American pin-up type who goes from Jekyll to Hyde once she gets behind Vin Deacon’s ass, and Japanese-American starlet Asa Akira does her best to steal the show with a sexy, sensual domination session that has Wolf Hudson happy to be on his knees and all filled up!