Archive for May, 2010

AVN Nominees: Face Fucking Inc. 7

Posted in AVN Nominees on May 29th, 2010
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Face Fucking Inc. 7

Face Fucking Inc. 7

Sometimes you just don’t want to fuck the pussy. I know it sounds crazy but it’s true. The mouth makes a real good fuck hole, after all. For times like that, what you want is a girl like Andy San Dimas, Sadie West, Alexia Sky, London Keys, or any of the other girls in this movie called “Face Fucking Inc. 7.” Can you imagine a company where the whole point is to give blowjobs? I mean real ones, not like imaginary talk about sucking cock in exchange for favors. That happens anywhere. No, I mean real good throat fucking that makes the mascara run all down her face like that picture over there!

Look how Andy is holding Sadie’s hair back for her while that big black dick invades her face, what a good friend she is! You can tell by Andy’s makeup-smeared cheeks that she’s had a cock in her mouth too! They both of them have a lot to handle when it comes to Mr. Marcus, but Sadie is game and Andy admits that she loves real rough deep-throating even when she isn’t working. Then there’s some good girl-on-girl action in the scene to make it even better.

All the other girls in this movie are hot and love sucking dick too, but I admit I got a special boner saved just for Andy and Sadie. There are eight scenes so if they don’t do it for you, I know you’ll find somebody else who will. Like maybe that hot British chick Roxy Jezel! She could tell me all about how she would suck me off to get me real hard with her accent and then she could actually do it and I’m pretty sure I’d blow the biggest load ever.

Lesbian Mentors 3

Posted in Uncategorized on May 28th, 2010
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Lesbian Mentors 3

I have never had a mentor for nothing. The only thing us monsters really do real good is fuck and I don’t need no help doing that. It’s kind of surprising that there are some people that don’t know how. “Course when you’re a girl and you’re talking about about fucking another girl maybe a class or something with a big-tittied MILF can help.

On the other foot, if you got all the girl parts and stuff already, don’t you already know how to use them? I’m just a monster tho, so what do I care? I just care about getting over my horny self!

The 3rd volume of Lesbian Mentors got all kinda good lesbian action to help you do that too. It’s got lotta pussy eating and all girl sex plus even a awesome redheaded MILF in Daria Crane who gets it good on with cute little Andy San Dimas.

This is a Nica Noelle deal and she my girl. All her stuff is real and none of that fake-ass fucking you see a lot in other type movies. She doing so good these days she gets some really top names in porn to do her films now. She even got Manuel Ferrara and Tori Black to work together in Don Juan’s Therapist. Both of them won AVN Performer of the Year Awards this year.  If you want to see some more of her films, these three down there a little way are a good place to start.

Now I gotta go fuck something. Maybe i outta get a mentor to keep around not to teach me some, but just to fuck when I want!

A Man With a Maid: Tales of Victorian Lust

The Babysitter

The Stepmother: Sinful Seductions

New Release: Sport Fucking 6

Posted in New Release on May 27th, 2010
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Sport Fucking 6

Sport Fucking 6

“Sport fucking” sounds like what we monsters like to do! I dunno a lot about Erik Everhard as a person but I know he must got a little bit of monster in him based on how he loves to fuck so much! Anybody who would name a series of movies “Sport Fucking” is all right with me. Erik is usually the lucky bastard doing the sport fucking with the girls in the movies, but sometimes he gets friends to do it… must be when he’s asleep or eating to get fueled up for more or something.

“Sport Fucking 6″ has all these total sex addicts in it like Rachel Starr, the one on the top left, and she gives some of the best blowjobs ever shown in a porno. Never forget the balls! A girl who gets into ball sucking is one you want to keep around, know what I mean? Things get so wet and messy with Rachel and Erik that it looks like she might slip off and go sliding across the floor. Olivia Alize, the one on the bottom right side of the cover, has the second scene and she’s fucking Erik too. She has pretty big tits that Erik decides to fuck when he’s not plunging into her puffy pussy! Who wouldn’t want to be tittie fucking some 34Ds like hers? Andy San Dimas is up next. She’s the real pretty dark-haired one at the bottom left with The Body, one of the hottest I ever saw! I just want to grab her tiny waist while I fuck her doggie style! She’s a ball sucker just like Olivia. These girls need to teach other girls about it.

In part two there’s the rest of the babes. Brittany Miller is first and she’s the sort of redhead on the upper right side of the box. Her scene is with James Deen the human fuck machine, who always knows how to bang a girl just right. They play geeks in love, or at least in lust. There’s good breast play if you like it, and why wouldn’t you? Mallory Rae is the sexy, lean blonde in the middle of the cover, wearing sexy stockings. After writing one of those notes on the mirror in lipstick to Erik, she starts playing with herself but pretty soon Erik shows up to help. The Latina with big tits on the bottom middle of the box cover is Lacy Cruz. In the last scene, Toni Ribas tries to get her to do her first ever pussy squirting with a rowdy fuck, but there’s a little bit of pissing instead. Good if you’re really a perv, and I am!

Bree Olson is bad-ass!

Posted in Featured Star on May 26th, 2010
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Bree Olson

Look at that pic! Keep looking…ok, that’s enough and good. Does a porn chick get any much cuter than Bree Olson? As you humans would go say I’d wager dollars to donuts that they don’t get all much hotter than her. Well, I’d say that if I like donuts. They’re too much covered in creamy and gooey stuff and all. Kinda reminds me of something…but I just can’t put one of my four fingers on it.

We monsters like garbage instead of them fatty ass round bakin’ goods. That and FUCKING!!! But, I also gotta throw Bree in there. I don’t know what kinda name Bree is. Must be some kinda Houstonite or Indianan thing which is where she lived when she growed up. Maybe it’s short for “breeze”, kinda like the one she creates when she sucking dick so good like she does. I wonder what my name is? I always just being called Monster alla the time.

Anyway, Bree’s body is pure like snow, but she’s really really nasty! She likes just about anything as long as there’s fucking going on. Maybe that’s why I like her so much! I already mentioned about the blowjobs, but she does good anal and fetish stuff and a bunch of other things too. She’s even won a bunch of what you guys like to say “hardware” for her good fucking, including a big 2010 VOD Award.

If she ever gets all tired of winning all them awards, I’ve got some big, yellow hardware I’d love to give Ms. Olson. Boy, what I’d do to her! She’s done so many great ol’ movies, it’s not easy trying to pick where to watch her fuck. But, I think the movies right here is a solid place to itch that scratch.

The 8th Day

Bree's Beach Party 2

Sunshine Highway

Sunshine Highway

Dirty Girl Sasha Grey

Posted in Featured Star on May 25th, 2010
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Sasha Grey

I hate to say it so blunt like, but you know how not that many girls in porn seem like they got all that many brains? Like maybe they keep brains in their boobies or somethin? Well, Sasha Grey is way different. This girl is probably smarter than most people watching her, you can just tell. She talks all smart in interviews right before going off to make another super dirty hot movie to make all of us spank it. She went and did that “Girlfriend Experience” movie where she was sort of a high-class hooker who pretends to like the dudes and be dating them and whatnot, then she made some music with her own band and some other people’s bands, and then she did some modeling for American Apparel too and before you know it she’s supposed to be playing a girlfriend again, this time on the next season of that HBO show called Entourage. I heard she also has a movie coming out where she plays some kind of churchy prude! Now THAT is acting and she maybe will get an Oscar if she gets us to believe she hates sex!

But that don’t mean Sasha Grey is out of porn now! You still get to see all the DP, anal, rough sex stuff that made us love her in the first place way back when she did that orgy scene in “Fashionistas 2″ as her first scene! Belladonna has caught her doing some of the best nasty stuff of all and now there’s a new release called “Fuck Sasha Grey”… boy would I love to do that! This is stuff that you’ve never seen before, clips of Sasha showing why she is so hot and nasty! So here’s that and two other new Sasha Grey movies. I hope she never forgets us fans of all her hot fucking!

Fuck Sasha Grey

Fuck Sasha Grey

Cheating Hollywood Wives

Cheating Hollywood Wives

Enter the Peepshow

Enter the Peepshow

Southern Belles

Posted in New Release on May 24th, 2010
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Kagney Linn Karter and Alexis Texas lesbians

Southern Belles

Southern girls are totally rockin’ hot. They usually got these nice bodies and show ‘em off real good because the sun is always out. That means that they are going to wear really short shorts and tops and stuff. That is if they wear anything at all!

But, I didn’t know much about how they talk until about now. They have what you people call aksentsakcents, you know, like a southern way to talk. I didn’t know that before. Or, maybe I just didn’t care none, because usually when I’m fucking them they don’t talk much because they’re screaming loud. I don’t think you can scream with an akksent. Anyway, once someone told me about how different girls have a different way to talking depending on where they live I started to pay some attenshun to them because I wanted to see if it’s true. It is!

This movie got some really bad ass southern babes like Alexis Texas and Kagney Linn Karter. You gotta be real southern if you want to call your porn name by “Texas”. I’d like to see some hottie call herself Missy Missississippissippippissippi…DAMN! That state fucks me up all the time.

You get plenty of doggie and blowjobs and other fucking from these southern hotties plus some side-saddle. ha ha…that’s a good kinda fucking for a girl from where they got a bunch of livestock.

Kagney Linn Karter

Alexis Texas

Big Tits Movie! “Tits to Die For”

Posted in New Release on May 22nd, 2010
Tits to Die For

Tits to Die For

It probably ain’t true that you need to die to get to fuck these girls with their great big tits, but if you had to you just might be willing to pay that big of a price. It would prolly depend on how long it’s been since I fucked anybody! Kagney Linn Karter, the girl of the week around here, looks like her boobs are nice and juicy, just big enough and perfect for titty fucking, nipple-sucking perfection you get to drool over in high definition! Her body gets my yellow monster cock rock hard… she looks so good bouncing up and down in reverse cowgirl, with those breastseseseses bouncing up and down and up and down kind of like melons on springs.

Sophie Dee, Heather Summers, Madison Scott, and Madison Ivy all have big ones that make your mouth water and they’re all in this movie. Like Kagney, they’re mostly blondes and most of them have perfect DSLs. I like girls with dark hair too, don’t get me wrong, but yellow hair and big tits make me think of the first girl monster babe I ever fucked! Oh memories!

OK I getting too worked up to type anymore now gotta go fuck somethin after all that talkin bout big titties!1!!1

Teen Slut Lexi Belle

Posted in Featured Star on May 21st, 2010
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Lexi Belle

Lexi Belle is like sweet and hot and blonde and cute and slut all wrapped into one. She like one of those lizard things with the wierd eyes that blend into its surroundings. Well, maybe not because she stands out so much. Damn. Okay. She’s like a riddle tied up with anigma an ahnigmah…I don’t know what that word is. You know what I’m trying to say tho, right? She’s fucking sexy and maybe one of the tightest chicks in porn right now. I mean, look at her picture! Is that freaking bad ass or what? Smooth skin and perfect natural tits…wow. Lately she even goin’ and growin’ the bush some for a total classic porn look. Is there anything she CAN’T do? Man, I’m horny!

Well, she ain’t can’t really do a teenager no more technically because she isn’t one, but she sure can play one good. Look at the Mother-Daughter Exchange Club 6 movie and you’ll see what I’m saying. But even if she can know how to act all innocent, she bangs like one of those banshee animals. Banshees don’t fuck as good as us monsters tho! But I’d like to see my monster dick in her sweet banshee pussy. It would be like…what’s better than really good? goodester. That’s what it would be.

I mean, she already won Best New Web Starlet and Best All-Girl Couples Sex Scene awards for her fucking. Of course, my monster fucking would win every time if I could get into an awards place. Problem is I’d would spend too much time trying to fuck and not give my speech.

If you can’t get enough Lexi, check out these films:

Mother-Daughter Exchange Club 6

Lexi Belle_natural tits

I Love Lexi

The Boss' Daughter

Teachers With Tits

Posted in New Release on May 20th, 2010
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Teachers With Tits

Teachers With Tits

Kagney Linn Karter (the blonde girl on the right on the box cover) must be about as good a speller as a big yellow monster in need of a fuck, with a name like that. Lucky for her nobody cares if girls in pornos can spell! Somehow in this movie she’s a teacher, must be teaching something like Sex Ed. In charge of detention, she lets out all but one student early because she wants to be alone with him after seeing a note he passed about her great big tits. So of course, she lets him put his hands all over them! If you love breast play this scene will make your dick so rock-hard. Looking hot as hell in her stockings, she learns him real good about the best way to do 69 before riding him on top of a desk.

The other teachers with big tits are also amazingly hot. MILF Devon Lee gets DP’d in a threeway. Eva Angelina in her glasses (the girl on the left on the cover) fucks Mark Wood. Uber-blonde computer teacher Riley Evans gets fingered and does some great titty fucking. In the last scene, music teacher McKenzie Lee takes on the mighty big dick of most guys’ porn idol, Evan Stone.

This movie would get two dicks up if I didn’t have only one dick!

Happy birthday, Casey Parker!

Posted in Uncategorized on May 20th, 2010
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Casey Parker

Casey Parker

Oh Casey Parker, the Movie Monster still misses you and your golden hair and your perky, perfect small tits! It’s your birthday and I just wanted to write to you even if you might never see it.

I don’t know if you know it but you have lots of fans still clinging to battered old DVD copies of “Casey Parker is the Girl Next Door” and “Lost in Puerto Rico,” wondering what made you decide to retire from porn last year. Why did you have to go and leave us here all alone to cry over what could have been? Were you just wanting to leave porn on a high note? Did you find some lucky guy who made you want to give up getting naked and fucking in front of cameras and strangers?

Oh, I sorry Casey, this wasn’t supposed to be no guilt trip. Whoever gets to fuck you now better be making you happy with plenty of good deep dicking. Happy 24th birthday, Casey, wherever you are!

And for everybody else, happy masturbating, because I know I’m not the only one who really seriously needs to fuck something or at least jerk off after looking at this hot picture! Something about a nipple popping out of a shirt always gets my dick throbbing. And you can see she’s gonna about touch her pussy lips and her clit any second now… if she isn’t already touching them!

OOOOMG gotta go now, bye!